Tagged: Army

FITS Socks – PART 2

I am currently neck deep in a large amount of work, but I had to take the time to write a Part 2 post about the absolutely incredible FITS socks… which by the way, show no sign of losing their comfort after another couple months of Afghan heat.

My name is Clifford, I am a sock addict, and here is my story.

My friends and I started a blog, and I thought it would be fun to hype something that I am obsessed with… comfortable socks. I had no idea that my gratuitous sales pitch for FITS Socks would lead to…

Apparently being deployed, and expressing your undying love for a product can lead to receiving some of them free of charge. It really helps if the product in question is made in America by patriots. I had been tipped off by the FITS sales rep that I had some socks coming my way, but I had NO CLUE how many… I pretty much reacted like this.

Now everyday is Christmas for my feet., and the rest of my sock collection was packaged up…

And unceremoniously burned… Alright, I made that part up, I actually got them cleaned and then gave them to some local Afghans who I knew would appreciate them. Their feet have never been exposed to the FITS level of comfort and thus they can actually still enjoy other brands of socks. Now it’s just me and you FITS. Spending some quality time together as we watch an Afghan sunset.

I gave out a good quantity of these socks to fellow Paratroopers, and received some of the following reviews.

  • It’s like they’re making love to my feet.
  • Where did you find these things? Are they even real?
  • Stuff like this is why we will eventually beat China, because they can’t reproduce quality like this, nobody can.
  • Why would I ever wear anything besides these? Do you think I can wear them all the time? Would they hold up in the shower?
  • I could see Jesus wearing these – Eddy
  • These are too good to ‘bate into.
  • Dr. Scholl’s ain’t got shit.
  • It’s like my foot is in a constant state of ecstasy, it’s a footstasy if you will

So once again, thank you FITS, for not only supporting the troops, but, more importantly, my feet.

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The Friday Five – Five Things I Love About America

Last Sunday, HBO ushered in a new program to counterbalance the vampire porn and keep us halfway interested in premium television until Game of Thrones returns in the spring. From the mind of Aaron Sorkin comes The Newsroom. Newsroom picks up where Danny Boyle left us in 2008; Jamal Malik, of Who-Wants-to-Be-a-Mumbai-Millionaire fame, lands the job of a lifetime in the demanding world of cable news blogging. Along for the ride is Jeff Daniels, who offers a captivating intro to this news saga and a refreshing perspective into the current state of America. If you haven’t had a chance to check it out yet, watch the first few minutes of the pilot episode below.

There’s certainly a lot to react to here. For one, let’s quickly break down what the three panelists reasons are for America being dubbed “the greatest country in the world”:

  • Token abrasive on-air liberal woman – “Diversity and Opportunity”. Typical safe, pandering bullshit. Yawn.
  • Stand-offish conservative blowhard – “Freedom and Freedom”. Typical conservative doubling-down of Constitutional catch phrases. Bullshit.
  • Our protagonist – “The New York Jets”. Honestly – go fuck yourself.

I realize this show is supposed to take place in 2010 in the height of the Rex Ryan/Mark Sanchez promise of tomorrow. But he’s clearly not a Jets fan. As a lifelong Jets fan myself, I can tell you with full honesty and sincerity that the New York Jets are quite possibly the worst thing about America.  They represent a bottomless pit of hopelessness and disappointment.  They live in the shadow of a more prestigious, more acclaimed, more dignified franchise and only make the  back page headlines whenever the New York Post writers need a proverbial punching bag.

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