There’s enough shark news alone that you missed out on, nevermind the other stuff in the world. Can we seriously lay off the shark news? I think I’m terrifying Clifford over here.
You probably don’t even know 3/4 of the things I’m about to list even happened. Well, that’s what I’m here for. Here’s what you missed last week:
Really cool photos of Great Whites. All shark news. All the time. The PO Life.
American Pie actor Jason Biggs attacked by ape. Should have chosen to go up against the Shark…
700 million people lost power in India. And I thought the outages from last month’s derecho were a lot. I understand the number 700,000,000, but I have a hard time fathoming just how many people that really is. That’s 2 1/3 times the population of the United States.
Single? Pregnant? In a city? Sounds like you should answer the casting call to Single & Pregnant in the City! Be sure to move your cursor around for sparkles!
Cuba Gooding Jr. got into a “bar altercation.” Hey man, I’d be pretty upset with myself if I made Snow Dogs too.
Get rejected at a bar? Pee on the girl. Straight out of R. Kelly’s playbook, minus the getting rejected part because he’s, you know, R. Kelly.
Dr. Peter Venkman: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions.
Mayor: What do you mean, “biblical”?
Dr Ray Stantz: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath of God type stuff.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Exactly.
Dr Ray Stantz: Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
Dr. Egon Spengler: Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes…
Winston Zeddemore: The dead rising from the grave!
Dr. Peter Venkman: Human sacrifice,
dogs and cats penguins and sharks living together… mass hysteria!
Louisiana Tech’s mascot died and the vet tried to cover it up. College football: serious business.
How many expensive baseball card collections are found in attics every year? Didn’t the baseball card market collapse like 15 years ago?
Rashida Jones is absolutely my chick. Fuck Pam.
Man texts “I need to quit texting,” before driving off cliff. We almost had a Darwin award nominee.
The Cleveland Browns were sold for over $1 BILLION. The Browns? Really?
Who are the most eccentric players in baseball? #1 should be no surprise.
People who write online are too nice. In related news: Fuck you!
News about the new Mars mission? I’m curious. You see that? See what I did there? Damn I’m good!
That’s it for your weak-ass word links, time for video!
In strong guy news: repping 500 lbs.
I too am ready to beat giant asses, Jerry.
I think I’ve done a couple of these things myself.
This is more in line with how we would all respond to a certain Know Yo Po question.
Maria Sharapova hits Novak Djokovic’s balls with a tennis ball. So good. So painful.
NASA control room during Curiosity landing.
Driving in Russia is crazy.
This goat is a real jerk.
The pool was too small for the elephant to join 😦
Ump ejects the music guy. Awesome.
And your Simpsons video of the week is a little late, but: